I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
