you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
