hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
