Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
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