So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
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