I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
