My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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