I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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