let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
