She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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