the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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