school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
