I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
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