My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Randomize
