It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
