I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Just invented taco cereal.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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