he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize