He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Randomize