one two three fourrrrnication!
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
it was like eating out sand paper
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
