What did we do last night that was yellow?
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
