Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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