Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Randomize
