eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize