But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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