the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I love you. Go after that dick
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
