Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize