No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
