I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
