apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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