When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize