So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Randomize
