I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
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