I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
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