I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
