how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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