Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
