she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
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