I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize
