loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
