you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
