I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize