Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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