So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Randomize