Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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