Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Randomize
