he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize