They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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