summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
