last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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