Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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